Ooh is that another cute little ghost to drag?
Oh my GAWD
Idk why I keep getting sad over people that don’t give a shit about me.
if you ever tell me something and ask me not to tell anyone.. my best friend isn’t included
Me: can u give me x²+4y+ of tomatoes & 2(x²+8xy^3) of potatoes please
Seller: I dont understand
Me: well i dont give a fuck i didnt study in vain
those are polynomials you asked for a neverending curve of tomatoes
I will rip off your limbs and hit you with them
True friendship at it’s prime.
wake up i’m blind and i want cereal
i’m honestly one of those people that are just there like yeah i have friends and people talk to me but i’m nobody’s favorite person and nobody looks forward to talking to me everyday or anything and it sucks
how do you make someone holy
you beat the hell out of them
my 96 year old catholic grandma told me this joke
praising your kid for doing something “normal” people do and outright acknowledging it as something abnormal for them (“you finally came out of your cave upstairs!” “you finally put some nice clothes on!”) has a very real chance of making them feel like their normal is below average and looked down upon
tldr don’t say shit like “oh, youre talking to us, this is new”
dear lord jesus yes